Our Pre-Football-Season Rituals

In our house, preseason doesn’t just arrive. It rolls in, slow and gentle at first, then suddenly aggressive and everywhere. For us, it really begins with Summer Ball in July. That shift from breezy, unstructured days with an occasional conditioning workout to a schedule that buzzes with early morning weights, afternoon practices, and late-night meetings.

The moment Eddie heads out for the first day of Summer Ball is our official marker. It’s when practices stretch longer, planning ramps up, calls with coaches and parents multiply, and I start seeing more of his absence than his presence. When he is home, he’s either sleeping, eating, or buried in something work-related. The energy in the house changes, from less carefree to more focused. He’s excited, of course, but excitement wears a layer of tired and stressed this time of year.

Shifting the Rhythm

Preseason changes the choreography of our household. We eat together less often. He’s out the door before I’ve even blinked awake. And I start taking out the trash, doing the dishes, and handling all the little house tasks he would normally jump in on.

There’s the alumni/coaches game that wraps up Summer Ball and ushers in Fall Ball, which kind of serves as our own unofficial ceremony of sorts. Fall Camp brings little pockets of connection amid the rush, like Saturday catch-up dinners at nice restaurants. And somewhere in there, just before the real chaos starts, we carve out a date night. One really special date where we sit down and talk about last season, the season ahead, what he needs from me and what I need from him, what to avoid, and how to keep us steady in the whirlwind.

Prepping the Team at Home

With Ava, there’s a preseason conversation too. I gently ask her to cut her bonus dad some slack. She’s not shy about calling him out when he’s on the phone too much or gone too often, so I try to get ahead of that. We map out which games she’ll attend (since some Fridays she’s with her dad), and we plan her outfits (because she loves coordinating with us). She comes with me to the alumni/coaches game and sometimes to a Summer Ball practice, getting her own small slice of the season.

Supporting the Coach

Logistically, Eddie is self-sufficient. Emotionally, he leans on me. I listen, validate, and encourage, especially when the occasional hiccup hits, like an issue with the coaching staff or student transfer paperwork. (That’s when my admissions director side comes in handy lol.) But mostly, I’m the safe place where he can say things he won’t say to anyone else.

He’s good about checking in with me, too. Every day at work, I take a walk, and we talk then about our days, the evening ahead, and the little in-betweens. At night, I wait up for him, no matter how late, so he can unload the day’s weight before sleep.

If I’m being honest, balance is tricky. The season demands more from me than I ever will from him. There’s nothing in my world that requires the level of support he needs from me right now. So reciprocity comes in the offseason, when he works hard to give me time and energy without the scoreboard looming. In the meantime, I try to frame the alone time as me-time where I can indulge in my favorite pastimes like reading, brand work, and catching up with friends. Sometimes I succeed. Sometimes I just throw a fit because I miss him.

What Preseason Feels Like

Preseason is fresh-cut grass and new paint on the field. It’s upgraded helmets and crisp uniforms with bright decals. It’s the murmur of phone calls and the sharp cheer of the first drills. It’s nervous anticipation and excitement braided with the quiet hum of “how will this season shape us?”

I pray a specific prayer for him every season. And I try (big emphasis on try) to lean into the schedule rather than resist it, to embrace this unique, intense slice of our life instead of wishing for the old rhythm.

Because the truth is, preseason is not just a time on the calendar. It’s a test, a tradition, and a reminder that we’re in this together, from the first whistle to the last.

If you’re a coach’s wife, how does preseason look in your home? What rituals or unspoken routines kick in when the season starts to stir? Share them with me in the comments. I’d love to know how your team at home plays the game 🤩